May talking about the quantity of food she eats
My fair share is smaller than everybody else's.
May trying to talk to Silas, age 17
Silas: Why are you talking to me about this? I want to listen to Beethoven.
Dan teaching Silas how to park a car
It's all about getting your rear end in the right spot.
A conversation with our sons, the conservatory students...
May: All Classical music is Christmas music
Efrem: No it's not, like Beethoven's 5th or Dvorjak?
May: What about Tchaikovsky, the Nutcracker?
Efrem: Silas, isn't Tchaikovsky Romantic, not Classical?
Silas: Efrem, when regular people say 'classical music' they mean all the music composed before the 1900's when jazz emerged...
Efrem, who thinks his dad's grey hair must be the norm
"It's weird, Uncle Jason doesn't have any white hair, and he's over 40..."
Dan and Efrem working on homeschool together.
Dan: This week you have to write a poem
Efrem: Great, does it have to rhyme?
Efrem, for whom "Etats Unis" truly means vacation. Though it quite literally means United States.
"Why do the French say 'Etats Unis' when they talk about the United States. Doesn't that mean, like vacation or somethin'?"
Silas, talking to Efrem just after Dad told him he couldn't take a baseball bat downstairs while taking out the garbage.
"You come with me. You'll be my baseball bat."
Efrem, after his mom said she was tired of having noodles at lunch
"How could you lose the miracle of noodles?"
Silas, who must really like to whistle
"Don't make me smile! I can't whistle when I'm smiling."
Efrem, the great philosopher
"Being homesick is better than being carsick because if you're carsick you're sick to your stomach but if you're homesick you're just sad."
It was inevitable
Efrem: Daddy, does the tooth fairy really exist?
Dan: Do you really want to know?
Efrem: Yeah.
Dan: No, he doesn't exist.
Efrem: What?! Then who puts the money under my pillow, Santa?
Efrem (he learned this from his daddy, but it's cool that he too recognizes it)
"May rocks!"
One day in December
Dan: What are you doing?
Silas: I'm writing my Christmas list.
Dan: Are you going to include 'peace on earth' and 'good will toward men'?
Silas: Maybe, if I have room.
When neither of us knows what we're talking about.
Dan: I have too much chalant to do nonchalent.
May: Whatever, you don't have any chalant.
Silas, while watching a bird search the cracks between our porch stones.
"I'll bet it would be difficult to tell between a real bird and a robot bird."
Silas, while watching the USA playing Switzerland in olympic hockey
"Swiss means cheese."
May venting about the word "hebdomadaire"
"I bet the Belgians don't use that word anymore!"
Silas, who really didn't like our pumpkin soup with curry.
"This soup is not gracious!"
May, who plays violin and lives in the melody of the moment.
"Bass guitar is like salt. You can't really taste it, but you can tell when it's not there."
Efrem, following his sharp five year old logic.
"When that guy had food coming out of his ears, did he go see the doctor?"
Efrem, going to look at our weather station, even though the sun was shining in our window.
"I knew it, it's sunny!"
Efrem (4 years old)
"When I'm a man am I gonna get whiskers? Whiskers make you talk like a man."
Yes, it's true
Dan: Mommy and Daddy haven't shown you guys our superpowers yet.
Efrem: You guys' super powers is spanking.
Efrem (4 years old) as Dan was generously frosting a birthday cake.
"That's enough! I don't want to get a chocolate mustache!"
Efrem, the flower lover (4 years old).
"Forgetmenots are soo pretty because God made forgetmenots."
Efrem (3 years old) as we drove up the mountain to a ski area and finally saw some snow.
"It looks like merry Christmas!"
Efrem, after he had plugged the vacuum cleaner into the telephone outlet.
"I think we need new batteries."
Silas (6 years old)
Silas: I'm serious!
May: Hello serious, I'm May
Silas: Don't start that again, or else I'm leavin' (pause) with the car!
Efrem (3 years old) to Silas, who sometimes acts like a parent, or grandparent...
"You are NOT my grandparent!"
Silas (6 years old)
"Cool, look at those cloud formations!"
Did you ever say "cloud formations" when you were in first grade?
While May was combing Silas' hair
May: See, Efrem, I'm making Silas handsome.
Efrem to Silas: I'll save you!
Dan to Silas, before his stomach was awake in the morning.
"Eat now and your stomach will get used to it later."
Efrem (3 years old) as he stretched his curly bangs down past his eyes.
"My hair is falling"
Silas (6 years old) after seeing the Mariners and Orioles play.
"Do you know who won the [baseball] game we saw? The Oreos!"
May, at a loss to respond to one of Silas' vague questions.
"That's like throwing a question out of an airplane. You need a parachute on it."
Just a father and son talking about life.
Dan talking to Silas: Life is quick.
Silas: It's not as quick as you think. Life is as slow as the world turns.
Silas (6 years old), commenting on his dad eating cabbage.
"Who's being jurassic around here?"
Silas (6 years old), as the smell of May's homemade bread filled the apartment.
"This morning I want Rice Krispies and newborn bread!"
Silas (5 years old) after a little disciplinary talking to.
"I think that when you turn 33 you will have already forgotten this day."
Silas (5 years old) after Efrem accidentally broke Silas' clay boat.
"Efrem doesn't appreciate my art!"
May
"Having kids ages you about 20 years in 15 minutes."
But I think she still looks pretty young, don't you?
Silas (5 years old), we're on the middle of three floors.
"This house is a Workman sandwich."
Living in Kandern Germany, Hauptstrasse 5
Silas (5 years old), as the moon slid behind a hill while we were driving home.
"It (the moon) misses us to smithereens"
About cheese
May talking to Efrem: Silas loves that kind of cheese (mozzarella).
Silas: I ate it SO many times and it did not kill me!
May, referring to the sores and peeling skin on her palms and fingers.
"Won't it be amazing when my hands work?"
Hanging out one day
Dan talking to Efrem: Ouch! don't bite.
Silas: What happened?
May: Efrem bit daddy.
Silas (with a frightened gasp): Is he poisonous?
Silas (4 years old)
"If you drink too much coffee it will turn you into cement"
We have no idea where that came from.
Silas (4 years old), commenting on his dad's "Blue Man Group" album.
"This music is obnoxious!"
May, about to go on her German language learning route
"I get to go be silly. Have fun, guys, being normal"
Silas (4 years old) to his mom
"What's for dinner tomorrow, babe?"
He knows that's not appropriate now!
A conversation between Silas (4 years old) and Dan:
Silas - What if this whole place (our apartment) was filled up with pajamas, up to the ceiling, and we couldn't hear the buzzer? What then?
Dan - What if there were no hypothetical questions?